By Vexen Crabtree 2002
Occurred: 2002 Mar 25 (Monday morning)
A girl and I are on a bed, in a public place. We are in America, in a place like a cinema where everyone watches the film on beds. She is attractive. Her and I take it in turns to stroke a cat that is wandering around on our bed. We are somehow chatting each other up. At one point I softly take her hand and stroke the cat with it.
Also on the bed is a machine (for some reason it is a Live Journal machine; it works that a person puts a message in it and the other person can read it a few moments later). Her and I use it and have a teasing conversation. I asked her name, but she didn't say.
At one point I pounced her, laid on her and kissed her cheek and neck. The kissing bit was awkward.
Suddenly, we are in a car, in a very old car park near an old, large low quality hotel. There is a freeway nearby, and the area is run down. A policeman wrenches open the car door and says (in these words I imagined him to say) "if you ever have bad luck, you better get out of here".
The car park has filled with fully armed police hiding around all the old or wrecked cars, pointing their weapons at the hotel. I take the girl away, towards the freeway. The other side of the freeway is an uninviting forest that looks dark and brooding, and the freeway has many cars going fast.
There are 2 ramps going down to an underground place. A smelly, old, dirty, disused place with tramps in. The dream has become a horror. Tramps appear frequently in my nightmares!
We go down there because I want to be out of the line of fire. At the bottom of the ramp is a large room, with vertical pillars. Like an underground car park, but a very small one.
I am wearing tough black combat trousers, a leather jacket and tough leather gloves. I am holding a large heavy duty torch. There is more than one person down there, and they are hostile. She says "we should go back up" and I agree. For some reason we are going to go back up via the other ramp though, which means we have to walk quickly through the room.
Someone throws a knife at us. I pick it up. A well built person stands in front of me with a big knife. I shout "no" at him. I make 3 similar pretend strikes at his hand, each time he moves out of the way. The third time, however, I know he is going to make a chop at my hand, so I only make half a strike and as his chop comes in, I make a quick slash and cut his hand.
He was surprised I tricked him. In the moment I make another quick slash at his other hand and cut it badly. There is a momentary stand off because I'm not a fighter and I don't know what to do next, and he is confused and thinks I'm really good! When actually that was lucky.
He jumps on to the girl. I jump on to him. I press my knife into his back slowly by 2 inches. I think about pushing it all the way in but am scared it could go all the way through him and into the girl.
Something happens, and the guy runs away. The lighting changes, it is still night time and now is very quiet. There is a feeling that something is changing. I realize all the police in the car park are no longer there, and the hotel is now deserted. Even the tramps have become still, asleep and seemingly they have all died and began to rot. A foul smell is in the air.
For some reason "hell" is happening to us, the environment's dying means that an area of "hell" is surfacing inside and out of the girl and I. It's strange and there is a period of time in the dream where I'm bodiless. Not floating or moving, just observing the dark decaying basement car park with no body.
Using strong determination, I make the pair of us appear back in the car park outside the hotel on ground level. Momentarily she and I are there, and we are beginning to feel relief -- but something seems seriously wrong. We realize that we were too late, and there is no world for us to return to. We have been left behind.
We felt a moment of "connectedness" to each other, some emotion and sadness and some feeling, some recognition that our short term relationship has boosted our self esteem and sense of worth, because the relationship was so innocent and simple.
Before my eyes, she turns into a crumbling, rectangular pile of scorched black rock and her humanness evaporates; she is dead forever. This happens because we've been left behind and can no longer exist.
A moment later I know I turn into a similar black pile of rocks. In the very last moment of the dream, I see the cold wind brushing over her and sending thick dust into the atmosphere as the black rocks that was once her begin to disintegrate into the dead atmosphere. I theorize that I will be blown into nothingness by the wind; all my strength was taken, but I didn't notice how or when.
The idea of just turning into rock and ash, and blowing away in the wind, made me feel melancholic in the dream. After it happened to the girl and I knew it was going to happen to me, I was resigned to it. There a bit of disappointment that life is short and things are unfinished, but the inevitability prevented panic or desperation. Things just ended with a sigh.
“Ashes are often interpreted as a symbol of good luck, especially of financial good luck. Sometimes ashes indicate a coming inheritance.”
"Teach Yourself Dream Interpretation" by Leila Bright (1999)
This description of ashes according to Leila Bright seems completely irrelevant to the actual dream; I imagine she is writing of the ashen remains of relatives, hence the connection to inheritance. The ash that finalized my dream was a completely different affair! Before embarking on any dream interpretation, read my "A Realistic Guide to Dream Interpretation" by Vexen Crabtree (2005).